


remind me how to forget

by tusslee



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Boys Kissing, M/M, Some feels, a little bit vague, i dont even know, v still cant see
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-30
Updated: 2016-12-30
Packaged: 2018-09-13 07:07:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9111898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tusslee/pseuds/tusslee
Summary: “I’m being quite selfish tonight, I realize, but you know I’ve waited for far too long. I want it to be me tainting your thoughts, me you reach for in the morning, me who you ache for. If I am jealous then so be it. For you, Jihyun, I’ll take on any role. Don’t you know how much I love you? Isn’t it a bit pathetic?”





	

“Describe it to me.” V’s voice is soft, pleading, and maybe a little bit embarrassed. Jumin doesn’t understand why he’d be embarrassed, but then again it’s V.

Jumin sighs as he leans on his forearms against the railing of his balcony. The sun is only just beginning to set now and neither of them have slept since sometime yesterday, which is nothing new. Sleepless nights are a common thing these days. His coffee is getting cold as are his fingertips, but he’s still not quite willing to ask V to go inside.

“Red.” Jumin says as he watches the clouds float lazily across the sky, “Red, orange. Everything looks like it’s on fire. In a few minutes the trees will be bathed in gold and then the clouds will turn pink, purple. It’ll be dark soon.”

V snickers from beside him, hand coming up to hide his grin, “Is that your professional opinion?” 

Jumin rolls his eyes, “Why ask if you are only going to tease me?” 

“That was very poetic. I think I’ll have to keep that one in mind, “trees bathed in gold”.” V only smiles when Jumin clicks his tongue in irritation.

“It’s your own fault. You talk like an old man. It must be rubbing off on me.” Jumin attempts to defend himself, but the excuse is weak and he knows it. He doesn’t really mind being the butt of the joke if V continues smiling like he is now, though. 

V hums as he brings his pipe to his lips then inhales deeply. He exhales the smoke slowly, the scent familiar and comforting to Jumin. “I suppose you’re right. Hm, when did we get so old, Jumin?” 

“We’re not old, Jihyun.” Jumin chuckles, “You just have an old soul.”

V nods, this is not the first time someone’s said something similar. He figures he must be getting old, though, because the cold never used to bother him, but now it seeps into his skin and makes his bones ache. He frowns as he drags in another lungful of smoke. 

There’s something very isolating about not being able to see, as if he’s the only one in his dark world. Jumin is right at his fingertips, yet he feels miles away because he can’t see him. He can feel him, though, hear his even breaths, and smell his subtle cologne. V wonders what kind of face he’s making, if he’s watching the sunset, or the city lights flicker to life with the growing darkness. He can no longer read Jumin’s expressions to figure out what he’s thinking so more often than not he has to ask. 

“What’s on your mind?” V feels Jumin stir next to him at his question. 

“It’s getting cold.” Jumin says then V feels chilled fingers wrap around his wrist. He lets Jumin drag him back inside without complaint. He hears Elizabeth meow happily at their return and Jumin says hello to her before they continue on to sit in the kitchen. “More coffee?” Jumin offers.

“No, thank you.” V slides onto one of the barstools and leans forward on one elbow as he closes his eyes. There’s no difference, but they ache less when they’re shut. 

Jumin sits beside him, their arms almost brushing and V can feel the warmth radiate from him. He’s always been warm, like a space heater. He can smell Jumin’s coffee, apparently refilled. He figures it will be another late night for them even though they are both beyond exhausted. V turns to face his best friend and reaches for him with both hands until his fingertips meet the fabric of Jumin’s expensive button up. Jumin stills under his touch, V can feel him holding his breath. 

“Relax.” V coaxes, “I just want to see you.” At his words, Jumin exhales slowly and the tension falls away from his body. V presses his palms flat against Jumin’s chest, slides his hands up and over his shoulders as his fingertips press into tight muscles. Jumin sighs, the sound soft and V can imagine him closing his eyes, the way his lips press together in a tight line. He continues his trek, fingers slipping up Jumin’s neck and over his jaw. “You need to shave.” V notes the stubble compared to Jumin’s usual smooth appearance. 

“It’s been two days, don’t nag me.” Jumin grumbles halfheartedly. 

V’s thumbs brush gently across Jumin’s cheeks then he traces neat eyebrows, closed eyelids, the straight line of his nose, his full lips. He knows every bit of this skin, has stared at it for the better part of all the years they’ve known each other. He drags his thumb along Jumin’s bottom lip and he feels his warm breath when they part, something wet brushes against the tip of his thumb. “Do not lick me.” V scolds.

“You taste good.” Jumin argues as he catches V’s thumb between his teeth. 

V flushes, “I might take that the wrong way.” He warns, hoping to throw Jumin off, but the man only hums as he grabs V’s wrist to hold his hand steady. His tongue is warm and wet against V’s thumb, unrelenting in its thorough exploration until Jumin seems satisfied and releases it with a lewd sound. 

“Take it however you wish.” Jumin says blandly. V clears his throat and tries to pull his hand away, but Jumin keeps a tight hold on him. 

“You’re very bold tonight.” V observes. 

“I’ve missed you.” Jumin admits, “I do not wish to waste time sleeping when I have you here with me for a moment. When will you decide to leave me again? I never know so I have to take what I can while I have it right in front of me.” 

V sighs, “I told you I’m not leaving anytime soon.”

“You said that last time as well.” Jumin’s voice is hard. The stool scrapes loudly against the tiled floor when he stands and V flinches. He can feel Jumin hovering over him, but when he searches him out, he can find nothing. He can only feel, only hear, only rely on Jumin to see everything he’s been trying so hard to hide. “I won’t sit still next time you disappear, Jihyun. I’m tired of your excuses. You can keep your secrets, but do not hide from me. Those vacant eyes of yours speak a much different truth than your pretty mouth.”

“I’m sorry.” V licks his lips nervously as he fidgets under Jumin’s penetrating gaze. He can’t see those eyes on him, but he can feel how they pick him apart.

“I’m tired of hearing that. It’s beginning to sound less and less genuine every time you say it. You feel guilty, but I don’t know what for aside from lying to me. There’s more to it than that, isn’t there?” Jumin sighs, the sound exasperated, and V can feel him giving up, “I’m right here.” Jumin’s large hands cup V’s face gently, as if he’s fragile. “I’m not going anywhere, so always come back to me.” 

V nods, blinks away the stinging feeling of tears, and pulls Jumin toward him until he wraps him in a tight embrace. V buries his face in Jumin’s chest and holds onto him in hopes that maybe he can drag him into his world just for a little while. 

Jumin pulls away only to press a gentle kiss to V’s lips, gentleness only lasting for so long when V’s fingers slide into his hair and pull. V’s mouth opens willingly under Jumin’s skilled tongue and soon Jumin is out of breath as he kisses along V’s jaw, down his neck to suck on sensitive skin. “J-Jumin..” V’s fingers tremble where they’re fisted in Jumin’s shirt.

Jumin hushes him as he lifts him easily. V’s slender legs wrap instinctively around Jumin’s waist as he carries him somewhere else. Jumin drops him and he falls back onto something soft, his bed by the smell of it. V listens carefully to the sound of Jumin shuffling about then feels warm hands on him again, in his hair and sliding down his chest. It feels like it’s been ages since anyone has touched him like this and it sort of has. Especially since Jumin has touched him like this. After Rika…

“Don’t think about her.” Jumin says as he pushes V backward until his back meets the bed.

“I-…”

“Don’t lie to me, Jihyun.” V nods and lets his fingers slide up Jumin’s arms, now bare since he apparently took off his shirt. “Do you remember the first time I had you underneath me like this?” V shudders, nods again. “Tell me about it.”

“O-our first year of college. We were up all night and the sun was just coming up when you looked over at me and rolled over until you were sat on my lap. I didn’t know what you were trying to do, tease me, or…”

“At first, yes. I thought it’d be a funny joke.” Jumin bends and nuzzles V’s neck, “But then your wide eyes caught me off guard and you blushed.”

“You kissed me.” V can picture vividly the second Jumin’s playful expression turned to something more dangerous and dark, the way he leaned down and hesitated a fraction of a second before he kissed him. It was clumsy, but desperate on both ends. 

“I kissed you and my world became much more complicated. Did you know my feelings back then, Jihyun? Was it just me who was confused?” 

V shakes his head and gasps when Jumin’s teeth drag across a particularly sensitive spot, “No, I didn’t know. I didn’t know anything other than it felt good and I wanted more.” 

“I wanted to keep you like that forever, all out of breath and red in the face. I don’t think you know how lovely you look all fucked out. In that moment you were entirely mine, your eyes were only on me and what I was doing to you. After that, it was all I could think about, but we were young and I thought perhaps I was just confused. After all, you were my best friend.” 

“Jumin, please don’t tease me.” V shifts under Jumin’s weight.

“I’m being quite selfish tonight, I realize, but you know I’ve waited for far too long. I want it to be me tainting your thoughts, me you reach for in the morning, me who you ache for. If I am jealous then so be it. For you, Jihyun, I’ll take on any role. Don’t you know how much I love you? Isn’t it a bit pathetic?” Jumin sits back and drags V with him until they’re both sitting upright with Jumin in V’s lap. V presses his lips to Jumin’s chest and rests his hands on his waist. 

“It’s pathetic only because it took you so long to realize what those feelings were. I can’t give you everything, Jumin…” V says, trails off at the end because Jumin already knows. 

“I don’t want everything. I just want you.” Jumin’s blunt response makes V falter and he looks up at his best friend with blank eyes, wishes he could see what he already knows is there. 

“It’ll be a chore to fix such a broken man.” V jokes, but his voice shakes with worry. 

Jumin’s hands hold his face again and he feels warm breath against his lips. Jumin’s nose brushes against his own, “You are not broken. Damaged, perhaps, but you are still whole. Will you let me remind you how to forget?” 

V nods and he pulls Jumin tumbling into his dark world to be the only source of light he needs.


End file.
